Let me recap some important principles of having a courageous collegial conversation:
~ Always make sure the person you want to have a conversation with is ready to receive your communication before you launch into the details. Start with a opening sentence that has a purpose that includes the two of you having a better relationship e.g. “Let’s make sure we work well together on this project and iron out a few issues before they become a problem …”
~ Make sure you find some respect in your heart, or appreciation of the other person, before you attempt any courageous conversation – your aim is to improve your understanding, relationship and reach agreements.
~ Be curious not furious. Use your empathic listening skills, even if you disagree.
~ Remember, not all conflict will be resolved, even if you are keen to talk … it takes two to want to engage.
~ Knowledge is talking … wisdom is listening.
~ Acknowledge your part in any problem and make it clear what you are prepared to do to make changes.